Oxymoron Diaries

Oxymoron Diaries
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Sunday, March 18, 2012

Oxymoron Diaries | Good Morning

Oxymoron Diaries | Good Morning. At first glance you may be scratching your head, but think about it for a minute. Not every morning is good, right? In fact THIS morning at MY house is at the very best borderline. Don't get me wrong, I'm a "my cup is half full" kinda gal. If you've read any of my blog posts you know that's true. I take lemons and make lemonade on a routine basis. But sometimes ... like this morning ... if I'd said "Good Morning" to a certain person sleeping on the couch, I might have lost a limb.
oxymoron diaries good morning
"Why? you ask. Well, basically because the dogs barked all night long. Barked all night long from the family room, where that certain person can't seem to get up from the couch and walk to the bed at night.

My theory is the dogs bark every night because they want this certain person to get up and leave them to their own space. They want him to turn off the TV. They want him to turn off the lights. They want to sleep without disruption from "Hillbilly Handfishin'" or "Swamp People." (Did you know those two shows I just mentioned didn't come from my imagination? They are actually televsion programs that supposedly intelligent, normal people like ENGINEERS watch routinely. I swear the dogs are barking because they know if they see one more fake gator rolling around in the swamp, they will chew the cord from the wall and electrocute themselves.)

oxymoron diaries good morningAs of right now I have been in the family room for 45 minutes. No barking. No nuthin'. The dogs have been fed, the dogs have been watered, the dogs have been outside and done their duty. Kinda makes you wonder, huh? At this moment, it has turned into a Good Morning.

Okay, I'll stop venting about that certain person now.

Actually, I have another example of when Good Morning may not apply. How about the Sunday morning after Daylight Savings Time? This occurred last weekend and it wasn't a good one at first glance for a number of reasons.

First of all I live in Ohio and was in Las Vegas for a business meeting last weekend. So I was already jet lagging from the three hour time difference after arriving at my hotel at 1 am (4am Ohio time). I had a conference call at 6 AM Vegas time that I couldn't miss, so I got just a few hours of sleep. But that was still a good morning to me because I love my Friday R Squared conference call. The people on that call are the wind beneathe my wings.

Saturday was a Good Morning kinda day, too.

I then worked all day Saturday at a very stressful meeting and then had to go to a company gathering that started at 9PM. Got back to the hotel at 1AM. Add in Daylight Savings Time and it was actually 5 AM Ohio time. Had another meeting at 9 AM. Didn't sleep a wink because the alarm clock in my room did not have an obvious way to adjust the time to DST so I was terrified I would over sleep and miss my meeting. I was giving a presentation first thing and could not possibly risk over-sleeping.

The biggest problem was that my phone, laptop, iPad, and alarm clock all had different times on them so I had no idea what time it actually was! I had to call down to the desk and ASK the front desk "What time is it?" They laughed at me. I did not laugh back. Definitely not a good morning when I finally got on the elevator that day.
 oxymoron diaries good morning
In my defense, it turned out the alarm clock automatically adjusted for DST. Who knew? Also in my defense, I once asked for a wake up call at a Marriott hotel for 5:30 and they didn't call me until 9:30. I now never trust them to wake me up on time.

Later in the day as I was flying home I was beating myself up that I had let the morning get to me, since as I said, I'm a "my cup is half full, not half empty" kind of person.

I felt better though after I read that Daylight Savings Time causes traffic accidents and emotional trauma.

I kid you not. You just can't make this stuff up.

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  1. We'll see how funny this is when "that certain person" reads this!

  2. "certain person" takes exception to this post as he has never watched "Hillbilly Handfishing"..........yet.

  3. Which means you HAVE watched Swamp People.